OVERCOMING AFFLICTION

I am reading the journal of a journalist that made a trip to a camp of refugees because she wanted to know herself about the situation of women in that place and in their country of origin. Those refugees were in a neighbor country because their own land was under a civil war. The journalist went to a meeting where several ladies attended. With the help of a translator, those women started to tell their stories, many of them similar, but all of them different, since each one represents a different person, a different name, a different life. Widows or single mothers, because their husbands were killed or simply disappeared. Their sons kidnapped, their daughters raped, and their mothers ill. Some of these women were severely beaten, thrown away from their homes, and had to leave their land, their jobs, and their future. And now they are refugees, undergoing hunger , depending on international organizations to survive and waiting to be able to return to their country someday. This situation is repeated in several parts of the world today.
As you see, there is pain everywhere, and we can’t help but experience it. You may have your own burdens and disappointments, through the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, injury or illness, an unfulfilled dream, etc.
Then we can ask ourselves what we can do to overcome so much pain. I invite you to look beyond your circumstances to God, and then you can discover the hope that will help you to move from grieving to healing. Here are some ways we can move beyond our grief to the God of all comfort: Acknowledge the experiences that have caused your deep sorrow. Ask God to help you better understand why you feel the way you do.

Allow yourself time to go through the stages of grief. Expect to deal with shock, denial, emotional outbursts, bargaining with God, loneliness, depression, guilt and acceptance. Don't be surprised by what you feel, and don't blame yourself for feeling it. Understand that it's all a natural part of grief.

Focus on God instead of your circumstances. Choose to think about who God is instead of how depressing your circumstances are. Read Scripture to remind yourself about the different aspects of God's character - loving, strong, merciful, etc. Remember that God is bigger than your circumstances, and He is ultimately in control of them.

Choose to believe that you can heal. Make the decision to believe that your tragedies can become opportunities for growth. Remember that God can bring good out of any bad situation. Ask God to give you a spark of hope to start a fire of healing in your life. The Bible says: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to this purpose” Romans 8:28

Look at your life from an eternal perspective. Ask God to help you see your life from His perspective so you can better understand how He will accomplish good purposes through your current pain.

Live one choice at a time. Rather than becoming overwhelmed when you think of how much healing you still need, decide to follow God's leading gradually, one choice at a time. Continually pray for the grace you need to do so.

Abandon wishful thinking. Accept the reality of your situation without trying to deny it or manipulate it to give yourself false hope. Realize that you can't change the past, and that sometimes it's not possible to restore people or things you've lost. Know that your life won't the same as it was before you experienced your tragedy. But know that God can always bring about healing transformation for your future.

Discern the difference between reality and truth. Understand that your emotions are real, but that doesn't mean you can use them to accurately determine what constitutes truth. Look to the Word of God and Jesus Himself for guidance, rather than shifting emotions. Know that even if you feel worthless or helpless, you're not, because the Bible and the Lord say you're a person of great value who can receive help directly from God.

Forgive. Choose to forgive people who have hurt you. Ask God to help you do so. Enjoy the freedom you experience when you do. One of the ladies in the refugee camp told to the journalist: “I don’t believe in rage and hatred, they are unproductive.” Tremendous words in the lips of someone who lost almost everything!

Share your burdens with people who care. Those women at the refugee camp used to gather together for support each other in their needs. Others have testified how great it is for their well being to be part of a fellowship. I have a friend that has a kid with Down syndrome and she is a part of a foundation for parents with kids like hers. She has found a lot of encouragement, inspiration and support there. So, do not put yourself away from others in your pain. Surround yourself with a strong social support network of friends and family members with whom you can talk about your grief and healing.

Use your talents. Serve other people in need to take your focus off your own problems. Pursue a hobby or take a class to develop a new skill.

And once again I tell you: Pray! Make prayer a regular habit. Know that when you communicate with God, you're inviting Him to pour out His healing into your life.

Written by Georgina Thompson for Women of Hope, Project Hannah radio program.